It’s really tiresome .. being in doubt and in confusion.
It’s very hard to explain my existential status or my existential feeling but I feel that something doesn’t fit .. something is not where it is supposed to be..
And it seems that I can’t let go my senses of nihilism, and its destructive questions like, so what? ( why bother and all the series ), and what’s after?
Questions that really make sense!
The fact that I can’t answer these question is overbearing! I feel, aimless? no that’s not the word, I might feel a bit like Sisyphus but in a reciprocal way.
What consulates me a bit, that I am ignorant and I acknowledge my ignorance.
Doing that it leaves me wondering if my question got any answer at all, and my ignorance always leaves the possibility that there might be one, which comes contradicting to my intuition ..
Still I won’t stop looking .. because I am ignorant!
One last question .. to people who find life all purple and easy ! why?
Why do you find it like that? what makes you think it is all purple and easy?!
Enlighten my spotless mind please.